I looked over at Sam, and saw the terror written all over her face. She looked like she was afraid of Freddie. I laughed in my head at the absurdity of the thought. Why would she be afraid?I looked over at Freddie again, he didn't look disgusted anymore, just shocked, kind of like a lost puppy. I felt my empathy for him rebuilding and interfering with my better judgment, as it had so many times before."Freddie…" I started, but what could I say? It's not what it looks like?It is what it looks. Getting speed was going to be hard and maintainingit even more so. This hindrance on speed made control paramount.The regulars at the BMX circuit thought the unfavorable conditionslessened the chance of the odds on the favorite in the girl division towin. They were not taking into account all the factors. She had Matt towork on her bike. He knew the adjustments which needed to be made soRenee could have better control of her bike. Better control would meanmore precise turning and breaking.. Why is she there? It's fucking cold. I wish she was closer, just across the street, so I could scream something to her.But today it doesn't matter, it's late, very late, and I'm sleepy. I slept wishing me a merry Christmas.The company is letting everyone out early. Nobody worked today, really. There was the office party, with the ridiculous exchange of CDs, in a poor parody of the Christmas spirit. It's not about getting something that costs money, it's about sharing something, life, and. I waited a long time before striking again. Before I started I had decided to count to hundred before I laid on the next stroke and I followed that routine through the whole session. All the time I was trying to strike harder and I was rewarded with bigger bleeding wounds plus the excruciating fire which was becoming more and more intense, growing in strength all the time. The fire made me hot! I started to moan while I kept on whipping myself and I was sweating profusely. The pain and the.
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